You would be floating in self love one day, and one day you would be drowning in self doubt. Self love is not a destination, it's more like a journey. It's not like a goal that you once achieve, and you never have to look back.
Once you fall in love with yourself, you have to continue making efforts to stay in love. You need to hold on to yourself in the hard times. In those moments of insecurity and self doubt, you need to love yourself a li'l extra, be a li'l more kind to yourself and take care of yourself a li'l more.
Every time you see yourself falling apart, be patient and give yourself the time to hold yourself together again. Give yourself credit for the smallest of accomplishments that you make. Be proud of who you are.
Make sure you don't say anything harsh to yourself or end up hurting yourself. Negative self talk can affect you very badly. The whole world out there is ready to criticize you, pull you down, break your heart and bring your confidence, self worth and self esteem down. So, make sure at-least you don't end up doing that to yourself.
Now, let me burst a very common myth about self love. Self love and self care is not all about bubble baths and sheet masks and romanticizing your life. Self love means accepting yourself and loving yourself just the way you are.
But constantly making efforts to become a better version of you. Forcing your lazy ass to get out of the bed, exercise and get a better body is self love. Saying no to fast food and eating healthy is self love. Self discipline is self love.
Making yourself work hard for your dream job is self love. Studying all night to get better grades is self love. Pushing yourself on your own, to become better than yesterday, is self love. Setting healthy boundaries is self love.
Taking a stand for your self respect is self love. Valuing your time and energy, more than anything or anyone, is self love. Realizing your worth and not letting anyone take you for granted is self love. Not waiting for someone's approval of you is self love.
Not seeking external validation, but your own, is self love. Saying no to self depreciating humour is self love. Distancing yourself from negative people is self love. Recognizing and accepting your negative traits and toxic behaviour, and working on yourself, trying to change them, and becoming better is self love.
Looking yourself in the mirror, and liking and admiring what you see is self love. Making yourself proud is self love.
And look, Self love isn't easy, healing isn't easy. But that doesn't mean you have to go hard on yourself or lose hope and stop trying. With constant efforts, you can make things work. Just give yourself some time.
You can always have a fresh start. With every sunrise comes a new beginning. You can always choose change over monotony. You can always choose self confidence over self doubt. Darling, you can always choose self love over all the fear, self doubt and anxiety that you are suffering from.
Give yourself the love, you are willing to give to your partner. Shower your care and affection on yourself, just like you would be willing to do for someone you love. Speak those kind words to yourself, that you would say to a li'l kid, who did something wrong and needs assurance.
You are a li'l baby yourself on the inside who needs your own affection, care and support the most. Take care of that li'l child and be nice to yourself. You deserve it. Say no to negative self talk.
Say no to perfectionism. Say no to being overly self critical of yourself. Say no to being overly competitive in absolutely anything that you do. It's okay to fall down sometimes. It's okay to fail sometimes. It's okay to be bad at something.
You can't be good or perfect in everything that you do. You need to accept yourself and appreciate yourself for being 'you'. Don't love yourself and admire yourself only when you achieve something. Your self worth shouldn't be based on your achievements. Your self worth is not all about what you do but who you are.
You have to take yourself from self doubt to self belief, low self esteem to self worth, self hate to self love. Even if the world gives up on you, you not giving up on yourself is all that matters. You gotta keep trying. You gotta keep believing.
You gotta keep hoping. You gotta keep going. Hard times in life can make you lose your self confidence and self worth. Difficult phases in life can make you lose yourself. Continuous failures can make you doubt yourself. But one thing is for sure, that when you come out of such a difficult phase, it's not the same person anymore.
You are a far more stronger version of yourself. Falling into the pit hole and then climbing back up again on your own, is what makes you realize how powerful you are. In your lowest times you will always be alone.
No-one would be there to comfort you, when you'll cry yourself to sleep every night. You'll have to wipe your tears on your own. You'll have to force yourself to wake up, get out of the bed and face the world. You will be all you have. And honestly, you are all you need. Your own love and support is what you need the most.
You have to be willing to work on your issues and make yourself better. Don't wait for someone else to get you a ladder. You will have to drag yourself out of the pit on your own.
You don't need someone else's torch to get yourself out of the darkness. Your own light is all you need. Not getting any support and being all alone in times of need can sometimes work as a blessing in disguise for you. Because when you do it all by yourself and you actually succeed, that is when you start believing in yourself.
And that my friend, is your new beginning.
Cheers to new beginnings!
Cheers to new 'you'!
About The Author
Prakrati Maheshwari, born on April 9,2000, is a 22 year old, blogger turned author. She is a Chartered Accountancy student, a simple girl from Ratlam (Madhya Pradesh) India. She began writing when she was 14. She started her blog 'Unwind Emotions' in 2020. She self published her debut book 'Unwind Emotions' in 2022. Her passion and love for writing is what keeps her soul happy. She dreams of becoming a successful writer with a balanced corporate career. She writes for young adults and wishes to become a best selling author.
You can connect with her on linktr.ee/unwindemotions You can also buy her debut book 'Unwind Emotions' from the above link.
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