Friendship, according to me, is a very important part of life. A group of good friends, or even one or two genuine friends, can bring a lot of meaning to our lives. But things are only sometimes that simple, are they?
If you are reading this blog, I am sure you either have fake friends but don’t know what to do about them, or you are questioning whether your current friends are genuine. Whatever the case may be, trust me, you are not alone.
Almost everyone, at some point in their lives, has to deal with fake and toxic ‘friends .’And it is not easy. It can be really frustrating to deal with such people. And more often than not, fake friendships hurt more than you’d think.
From what I’ve gathered over the years, if you observe certain characteristic behaviors of your friend, you can easily tell whether they are your genuine friend or not. So, together, let us look at the signs of a fake friend and how you should deal with them in this blog.
4 Signs of a Fake Friend That You Shouldn’t Ignore
All four signs mentioned I have gathered from real life. With just a few days or weeks of observation, I could easily understand that I had been fostering a bunch of fake friends, and so can you.
1. They are Gossip-Mongersms One-Sided
The simplest way for me to put it is that you are always available for them, but when it’s your turn, things aren’t the same. And this can be seen with the simplest of things. When your friend texts you, you may reply quickly, but on the other side, you are constantly left out, and your calls are often avoided. These things go past our eyes because we are all busy and caught up with our lives. But small things matter.
2. They are Gossip-Mongers
Now, this characteristic is so easy to spot, but again, you may fail to notice. Friends do gossip about others. I know they do, and it’s completely normal. So do I with my friends, and I’m sure you do too.
But the problem arises when your friend gossips and badmouths a person and then behaves sweetly and politely on their face, hangs out with them, approaches them, and considers them a friend. This clearly means that they are doing it with you as well. Pretending to be friends on your face, yet back talking about you with other people.
3. Constant Comparison
If you find that your so-called friend is constantly comparing their life with yours, that's a huge red flag. This usually stems from jealousy and a sense of competition, which, frankly, is extremely toxic in any relationship. Whether it's your clothes, grades, job type, or even salary, they will compare everything. Stay away from such people.
4. Disrespect and Belittling
This one comes in the form of jokes. You may notice that your friend is constantly commenting on what you’re wearing, your body, maybe your makeup isn’t right, maybe you’ve put on weight or lost some weight; they will point everything out in the sense of mockery. This will happen, even to the extent that if you share your secrets with them, they will laugh at you.
Also, by chance, if you express that your feelings got hurt, the response will be, “Relax” or “Learn how to take a joke .”In this kind of space where you are constantly being disrespected for just being yourself, LEAVE.
4 Ways to Deal With Fake Friends
Now that you know the signs of a fake friend, I guess you’re wondering what to do next. Here are my suggestions:
1. Keep Your Distance
With fake people, you should always keep your distance. And that means setting boundaries, not talking about your personal life, or sharing secrets. Because they will most likely go around telling people everything about your life while you don’t have a clue. Know what to say and what not to say in front of them.
2. Don’t Be Available
Rectify your past mistakes. Don’t be readily available for them whenever they need it. Because, remember, they would not do the same for you. Call them back or respond to them on your own time. And avoid hanging out with them one on one. If it is absolutely necessary, then hang out in groups. Keep the focus on yourself and your work/studies.
3. It’s Not About You
Their toxicity, mean comments, constant mockery, and acting like they are on the high horse have NOTHING to do with you. Trust me, it’s a reflection of their own insecurities. When a person tries to make themselves look wiser or better than another, it has nothing to do with the other person.
They only do that to make themselves feel superior and somehow get comfort out of it. But one tip for you- stay on their level. Don’t start mocking or disrespecting them. Just distance yourself, as I have mentioned before, and things will eventually stop.
4. Confront Them
This option is for those situations when things are getting extremely toxic and intolerable for you. Tell them off on their faces and remove yourself from their lives. You really do not need temporary companionship. It is so much better just to be alone than to foster snakes.
Telling them off might not change them at all, but it will surely bring you peace. And your mental health is going to stay much better if you keep away from such people.
Summing Up!
Now, all suggestions aside, we understand how bad it feels to deal with such fakeness. I mean, you think of them as an important part of your life but don’t get the same in return. It really sucks.
But trust me, it is much better to know what kind of people you’re with than to stay in oblivion. Do not sit at a table where you’re not valued. Because, think about it, no one will really be there all the time. So, the last thing I’d like to say is to learn to love and be with yourself and not let fake friends bring self-doubt.
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